Trailer Snark (January 6, 2017 Theatrical Trailers)

Welcome to Trailer Snark, a weekly column covering trailers for movies that will be released this week with thoughts from our roster of bloggers (Jessica from The Female Perspective, Ken from The Crank File, Jim from The Front Row View, Rob from Spector for Hire, and Great Stories founder Chris).  Thanks for reading, and enjoy the previews!

And now to kick off 2017!

Underworld: Blood Wars (Screen Gems) – Action/Horror
Rated R for strong bloody violence, and some sexuality
Tag Line: Protect the bloodline.
Starring: Kate Beckinsale, Theo James
Plot: Vampire death dealer, Selene (Kate Beckinsale) fights to end the eternal war between the Lycan clan and the Vampire faction that betrayed her.
Running Time: 91 minutes

Jessica: I think they need to stop with these movies. The first one was great, but they kind of lost me after. I think I was bored with the endless gun battles. They’re vampires and werewolves, they should have freakin MYSTICAL powers, why do they need so many guns!!!!!????
Jim: I was so bored by this trailer I could barely remember it 10 seconds after I watched it.
Chris: I liked the original, but the sequels have left me cold.  And I can’t help but think of Milla Jovovich from Resident Evil when I see Kate Beckinsale do her butt kicking in leather bit.  Wait for the small screen!

A Monster Calls (Focus Features) – Drama/Fantasy
Rated PG-13 for thematic content and some scary images
Tag Line: Stories are wild creatures.
Starring: Sigourney Weaver, Felicity Jones, Lewis MacDougall
Plot: A boy seeks the help of a tree monster to cope with his single mom’s terminal illness.
Running Time: 108 minutes
Chris: It’s about time that Liam Neeson does the taking.  This flick seems to be a nice escape from the post-Christmas winter blues.
Jessica: This really looks fantastic. I was intrigued, I admit it. Totally something I’d watch.
Jim: This looks like a winner for sure, captivating and magical.

I, Daniel Blake (Sundance Selects) – Drama
Rated R for language
Tag Line: None
Starring: Dave Johns, Hayley Squires
Plot: A middle aged carpenter who requires state welfare after injuring himself, is joined by a single mother in a similar scenario.
Running Time: 100 minutes

Jim: Wow, does this look gripping! I’d rush out and see it now if I didn’t think I’d spend 2 hours sitting there and getting pissed off.
Chris: I feel the righteous anger awakening.
Jessica: As great as Daniel Blake looks, I’m not really sure that I’d get much pleasure out of it. On a pure enjoyment level, I’d go with A Monster Calls. Happy New Year!

Tickets Purchased:  3 for A Monster Calls!

A Unanimous Trailer Snark Decision!
A Unanimous Trailer Snark Decision!
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